Holidays and family occasions

The principle: family ties, not shared worship

The Quran tells believers to honour their parents. Even if parents push you to worship other than Allah, you do not obey them in that, but you still "keep their company in this world courteously" (Quran 31:15, translation of meaning). It also says Allah does not forbid you from dealing kindly and fairly with people who have not fought you or driven you from your homes (Quran 60:8). When Asma bint Abi Bakr asked whether to keep good relations with her non-Muslim mother, the Prophet (peace be upon him) said, "Yes, keep good relation with her" (Sahih al-Bukhari 2620).

The line scholars draw is worship. A SeekersGuidance answer says a Muslim should not actively celebrate another religion's religious festival, and at family gatherings should quietly step out of religious activities. A meal, a visit, or helping in the kitchen is ordinary family time, not worship.

Christmas and Christmas Eve

More lenient view: a SeekersGuidance answer from the Hanafi school (Waseem Hussain, checked by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani) says attending a family Christmas gathering is permitted as part of keeping family ties, as long as you discreetly stay out of religious activities. Egypt's Dar al-Ifta says that accepting invitations to attend such celebrations does not mean acknowledging the beliefs behind them.

Stricter view: the Islamweb Fatwa Center says to keep ties through visits and other permissible means, but not to join the festivities themselves. An AMJA scholar, Dr. Main Khalid Al-Qudah, advises apologising and declining a friend's Christmas Eve dinner invitation because it is a religious occasion (AMJA 77225).

Whatever view you follow, stepping out of prayers or a church service is something all of these answers share.

Gifts and greetings

Gifts: a SeekersGuidance answer says accepting presents from family, neighbours and co-workers is fine because it is a social custom, and giving presents in December to strengthen family ties is permitted if done in your own dignified way. An AMJA scholar, Dr. Hatem al-Haj, calls accepting gifts a sunnah and says you may decline a gift tied directly to a religious ritual (AMJA 1533). SeekersGuidance also advises not keeping a Christmas tree in a Muslim's own home.

Greetings: Egypt's Dar al-Ifta allows congratulating non-Muslims on their occasions, especially family and colleagues, as long as it does not mean agreeing with their beliefs. Shaykh Jamaal Zarabozo, himself a convert, advises not saying "Merry Christmas" and answering warmly in another way, such as "So how have you been?" or "I hope to see you again soon" (AMJA 85952).

Thanksgiving

More lenient view: Shaykh Faraz Rabbani (SeekersGuidance) says attending a Thanksgiving dinner with immediate family is permitted, since it is not an explicitly religious function, especially when there is benefit in going and harm in staying away. Ustadh Farid Dingle (SeekersGuidance) says national or cultural holidays are fine as long as you do not treat them as religiously sacred.

Stricter view: Dr. Main Khalid Al-Qudah of AMJA says Thanksgiving is historically a Christian holiday, so Muslims do not celebrate it, and he treats Mother's Day and Father's Day the same way (AMJA 76974 and 22994).

If you go, eat what is halal for you and politely skip any alcohol.

Halloween

Shaykh Faraz Rabbani, answering a parent in Canada, says that given Halloween's pagan origins, many North American scholars advise not taking part. He suggests giving your children treats or taking them somewhere special instead, and checking with local scholars. Dr. Hatem al-Haj of AMJA, answering a convert mother who wanted to share her own childhood fun, suggests putting that candy-sharing and dressing up into the two Eids (AMJA 83012).

We did not find a scholarly source that permits taking part, so we cannot show a more lenient view here. Some scholars treat handing out candy at the door as a separate question, so ask a local scholar about that. It is fine to feel a little sad about letting go of something you loved. Building new family traditions around the Eids helps.

Birthdays

More lenient view: Dr. Main Khalid Al-Qudah of AMJA says birthdays are not part of Islamic tradition, but people treat them as social occasions, so they are not among the explicitly forbidden matters and an occasional celebration, especially for children, is no harm (AMJA 77128). Dr. Hatem al-Haj of AMJA encourages a convert parent to celebrate non-religious occasions such as birthdays and exam results with her children (AMJA 1533).

Stricter view: Dr. Salah Al-Sawy of AMJA says it is not permissible to celebrate birthdays or to accept invitations to birthday parties (AMJA 22801). A SeekersGuidance teacher, Dr. Muhammad Fayez Awad, sets out both views and leans towards prohibition.

Easter, church services, weddings and funerals

An Easter or Christmas church service is worship, and that is where scholars draw a clear line. A SeekersGuidance answer (Ustadh Farid Dingle) says it is not permissible to actively celebrate another religion's religious festival, while learning about other traditions is fine. An Easter family lunch is treated like the Christmas meal above.

Church weddings and funerals have a wider range of views. Egypt's Dar al-Ifta and an AMJA scholar allow attending a relative's funeral, even in a church. SeekersGuidance Hanafi answers allow the family gathering but not the church service without a strong need. IslamQA takes a strict view, including on church weddings. Our core beliefs topic explains why worship belongs to Allah alone. Ask a local imam before the event, because the details of your situation matter.

Parties where alcohol is served

A hadith in Jami at-Tirmidhi (2801, graded Hasan by Darussalam on Sunnah.com) is the basis for many scholars advising against sitting at a table where alcohol is served. A SeekersGuidance answer about a family birthday party with alcohol advises politely declining a gathering centred on alcohol and offering an alternative, such as taking the family out for a meal or visiting beforehand.

Scholars differ on events where alcohol is present but is not the point of the gathering, such as a New Year's dinner. Ask your imam how this applies to you.

Food at family meals

Pork and alcohol are the clear things to avoid. Meat is where views differ: some scholars accept the meat of Christians and Jews under Quran 5:5, and many others and many Canadian certifiers accept only zabiha meat. You do not need to settle this at the dinner table. Many converts take the vegetarian dishes, fish or sides, or bring a halal dish to share.

If your family cooks pork in a shared kitchen, a SeekersGuidance answer from the Hanafi school says washing dishes and pans, even once, removes the impurity. Our FAQ has more on food questions.

Your first December

If this season feels lonely, you are not alone. In a 2025 Yaqeen Institute survey of 618 converts in the United States, about 40% said they felt lonely during Ramadan and 42% on Eid. Plan something for yourself too: visit Muslim friends, go to a masjid event, or invite your family to your Eid in return. Dr. Jonathan Brown, who became Muslim at 19, writes about keeping up his family's Christmas gatherings and wishing he had hidden his faith less.

If your family is hostile

If a holiday visit could lead to shouting, threats or violence, your safety comes first. A SeekersGuidance answer says you may reduce contact with a harmful relative and keep the tie in other ways, such as calls, small gifts and making dua for them. The Government of Canada's safety planning page can help you plan, and in danger you should call 911. Our red flags and staying safe guide and our family and friends guide have more help.

Things you can say

Common situations

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